I never thought I would say this, but for the first time in my life I was happy to be with her. I was actually alive and happy to have her in my arms, but something told me that this feeling wouldn’t last long. I’m not sure why I felt this way but it just was. It was just surreal but in reality it was something more that just happiness to me, it was love. I mean I had been with her for almost a year now and I knew that this was the person I wanted to spend the rest of my life with.
I left her house about eleven in the morning and I was on my way to work. I arrived there and the police chief was there who just so happened to be my step dad. He told me that I wasn’t going to work today but instead he took me to Christiana’s house from which I had left only about an hour ago from. When we got there I jumped from the car and ran to the front door where I saw the coroner pulling a body from the house. I ran to the body bag that was upon the gurney and unzipped it and I saw the face and fell to my knees crying in torment. It was Christina, my Christina. What the hell happened I asked and then my step dad told me that she had hung herself from the balcony on the third floor. I just didn’t understand it one bit of it the rationality made no sense. Why would she do this to her, to me, to us? In my mind she couldn’t have done this it must have been someone else and of this I was convinced of. Until they showed me the security camera video, and then I knew it was her that she had done this but the one question remained and that was why?
As the day of the funeral approached the eventual reality of her being gone had begun to set in, but I just had refused to accept it thus far. I guess the only thing that would really put things in perspective would be the moment when I don’t see her anymore and that she is buried with all my happiness and joy that had come with loving her. I had my friends surrounding me during all of this when the only person I could blame was me and for that I deserved no sympathy. It was a time for me of self realization that this is the one thing to me that I had lost with no explanation as to why but it happened and I couldn’t change that.
The day of the funeral came and I was morbid but what else can someone in my position feel sorry, angry, upset, happy? I mean I was feeling all of those things but for different reasons but most of all I felt morbid. I’m not sure why I felt this way but I did. As I rose to get up inside of the chapel, my legs felt weak. I struggled to get to the podium to speak of how great Christina was in my mind how much she meant to me. As I reached towards the end of my eulogy, I began to cry, I was crying so hard that my knees gave out from under me and I fell to the floor distraught. After the chapel ceremony we all gathered up and began a procession out of the chapel and towards the line of limo’s and hearse where her body was placed inside. As the door shut it seemed to me that it was a sign of condemnation, not for her but for me that I should have to suffer for all the things that I had done in my life wrong and as punishment I should spend the rest of my life without her in my arms.
As we proceeded towards the cemetery I began to think about all the good times that we had together and I got caught up in the moment of reminiscence, the car in front of my dad slammed on their brakes to avoid hitting the car in front of them but to no avail my dad’s car flew over their’s and landed in front of the hearse which then plowed through the car without having a chance to stop. Without a second thought I jumped from my car and ran to my dad’s car to see if he was ok or what, but it was too late. The impact of the wreck decapitated him and his head landed about fifty feet away on the side of the road. As I ran towards my dad’s car I began to get sick in my stomach at the thought of how I just lost the love of my life Christina and now my dad. I just couldn’t bear the pain anymore the torment and the agony of this just tore me apart from the inside out like a monster was inside of me consuming my soul as I tried to make sense of the events that had just transpired.
After the accident, the police took me to a mental evaluation center to get checked out because of all the things that I had gone through over the last few days. As I walked in to the lobby of the East View Mental Center there was a lady who liked like she was around twenty-three and she said to me that her name was Rachel. Rachel explained to me that I would undergo an evaluation and I might stay over the night for observation. As I walked through the door with what it seemed like was a million locks, I knew that I was truly in hell and I knew that in my mind it was going to be a long night. As I followed Rachel down the long hallway which seemed to never end, we made it to an elevator which she took me to the basement on where I was put into a room with a single metal bench. Once inside the room, the door was closed and the room went dark. Once the light went off I fell to the floor as I struggled to find the metal bench. Before I could find the bench though the lights came on and there was a big black man standing before me. As he walked closer to me I began to feel that this was a bad situation for me to be in but where would I go? As the man moved closer and closer to me I began to panic and break out in a sweat reaching for anything that I could get my hands on to pull me away from this, strange man. I kept sliding backwards on the floor so much that my back was a the wall and I couldn’t move any further back. The man took one final step and leaned forward over me. The man reached into his vest and pulled out a needle and began to wave it in front of me then, he stopped. To my relief the man put it back in his vest and turned around. I began to breathe a sigh of relief and then the man sat on the bench and stared at the wall. For a brief moment there was silence and then a loud bang. I stammered “ He, He killed himself” the only thing that remained was why? The man laid on the floor in front of me with his hand upon the metal bench. The door opened just a crack as I peered through I saw nothing then I saw everything. It was amazing yet scary it was like hell on earth, in the blink of an eye the building burst into flames as I walked towards the end of the hall way.
Then it stopped, it just stopped. I didn’t understand it but it happened. I thought to myself what could be the reason for this happening to me but I didn’t dwell on it to much longer as I reached the outside world I felt free but trapped inside. Inside I still felt remorse because of what I had lost because it meant the world to me and now I had to deal with it and move on and I just don’t want to, I mean If I could bring her back I would. I just wanted to have her in my arms and have her head on my shoulder but I knew it would never happen again. I started walking down the street towards St. John’s Catholic Church to see Father Amos to talk to him about everything that had happened, because I felt if there was a GOD then why was all of this happening to me?
After about thirty minutes of walking I finally reached St. John’s. As I looked up at the cross sitting upon the roof , the gates and doors swung open as if the wind had bomb rushed them. I began to walk forward and as I did the wind began to blow and howl all around me, but it didn’t. I reached the steps and stopped and looked around me to see if anyone was around, I saw no one. I walked up the three steps to the wood doors that had been violently swung open when the wind was in an uproar. I walked trough the doors and a man stepped out from the side and closed the doors so gently I didn’t notice until the final bang and click of the lock. The man walked beside me and began to talk to me about Christina and what I would do if she could come back. I thought to myself for a minute about his question and simply said “ I would give my life to see her again, but she isn’t here.” The man looked at me and than began to pace back and forth beside me and said “ I’ll make you a deal, if you give me your life then she will walk the earth beside you, lay next to you and breath again.” I looked at the man with utter confusion because how can a man bring some one back to life, but I looked at him and gave him my life. Nothing meant more to me than Christina and I knew that the way she died was not the way that she really wanted to leave this hellish place, but the man looked at me and said “ A deal is a Deal.” The man unlocked the door and Christina walked through them and hugged me. My face lit up and I just looked stunned at what had happened, I mean I was holding Christina in my arms. The man looked at me and said “ Now your Life.” I had a million thoughts going trough my head but I made a deal. The man left without telling me his name or how he brought Christina back but at the time I didn’t care because I was happy and I had the love of my life back in my arms and I was smelling her perfume, seeing the glow in her eyes, having her hair pressing upon my shoulder. I was in love with this girl but how long I would have with her, I wasn’t sure of that.
I looked to see where the man went but I didn’t see him anywhere, I picked up Christiana and carried her out of St. John’s and into the street. We walked for about three or four blocks and there he was, the man was standing in the middle of the street. I placed Christina on the ground and walked toward the man. I still had no idea who he was or even how he had brought Christina back to life. The man looked and Christina and then at me, he spoke in a calm voice and said “ are you happy?, I brought her back for you knowing what you would give up for this to happen and so it has happened, but now you are mine and you work for me. I know this may surprise you but my name is Lou.” With the look of bewilderment on my face I said “Lou?” “Lou as in Lucifer?” I asked. He said ‘yes” I supposed that I was going to do his bidding on earth while he contended with hell itself but why me? I understood what I had given up but what was the point of giving it up for someone that I knew that I might not see again or if I refused that at that moment she could be gone from my sight forever and that is something that I wouldn’t let happen again as long as I walked the earth. So I guess it seemed that I had no choice that I would give up my life for that of Christina, the only person that I loved. To it was just all of a sudden that this would change my life and make me smile and cry and love again but it was under circumstances that I just did not understand, I wanted to but I just didn’t know how to make sense of it. I turned to look at Christina to see her one final time before I vanished from her sight. As I turned to see her she looked at me as if she didn’t know who I was because from that moment on I was not of the earth but of the hell that would one day consume and ravage this place of abundance and of plenty but of hatred, and loss. As I watched her walk away from me in the street my heart sank to anger not of her but of me that I had chosen this choice. I stood there and watched the woman that I loved walk away from me because she had no choice but to do it , I knew that there was no way we could ever be together because of this. She turned the corner and vanished from my sight, I just don’t see how I could let her go for a second time. I fell to my knees and buried my head in my hands in dismay, when Lou put his hand on my shoulder and at that moment we were in hell.
When we got there Lou immediately took me under his wing and began to teach me his ways and what he would like to have done. as I looked at Lou I thought of Christina and what life must be like for her as I was no longer there for her. Lou looked at me as if I knew what he wanted but, I didn’t I was unsure of what he wanted or saw in me. I still wasn’t sure of even why he picked me of all people. None the less I continued to do as I was instructed to do, honestly where would I go?
Lou told me that I was going to take over when his reign came to an end as he sensed it would becoming real soon. I didn’t know how to take this I mean how am I supposed to become all that is hated and yet know that the woman I love is a living, breathing, walking, soul? The only bright side was I could walk the earth as I pleased. I longed for it but I didn’t know how this was supposed to happen but I knew that it would. After Lou and I finished talking he told me what I had to do and that was to walk the earth killing people taking lives as I pleased, but only based on the deeds of people.
The next day I knew what that meant for me and that was that I began my reign over the earth as a living breathing walking Grimm reaper if that’s what people wanted to call me. As I began to walk the earth I noticed many things. I saw people getting murdered for no reason what so ever, but It was happening and the only thing I could do is kill people and not be punished for my actions because after all I was immortal.
